Some general nonesense

The storm over the very sad death of Mrs Jacintha Saldanha seems to be focusing on the wrong areas. The media seem to be very comfortable to continue believing that this lady took her own life as a result of her part in the Australian radio prank. This is papering over the cracks somewhat.

We have to believe that if a person with as little involvement in the scenario as Mrs Saldanha had takes their own life that there are bigger problems with their lives. The grieving husband is angry with the hospital, with Australia, with everyone. He is right to behave like this as it is natural grieving behaviour .

He knows that amongst her problems his wife had to go to London to get a job, away from her family. Thats a tough gig. I have been there, its not nice. I wonder how Ian Duncan Smith feels about this?  He wants more people to do this sort of thing. I don’t know any more about her state of mind when she made her decision not to exist any more, to go any further would be speculation which is unfair. 

The fact is that this lady made the decision to take her own life. We need to believe, as a society that the actions of a bunch of idiots on the other side of the world won’t cause someone to kill themselves. We also need, as a society, to be acutely aware that people around us may need to let off steam, have a cwtch (hug in English) and…..
I don’t know how to end that sentence, as I don’t know how to end this post, except to say that it is such a shame that this lady did what she did, but not for the reasons you read about in the papers.

Mental illness resides in the least likely of places and it takes this sort of tragedy for people to sit up and listen. 

I was reading this column in the Gruniad this morning (http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/oct/10/patriarchy-rearing-its-ugly-head?CMP=twt_gu) and it occurred to me that while I agree with it I am and have been totally party to the society it castigates, albeit through no fault of my own.

When my wife and I got married it was commented that we are both so laid back that nothing will get decided, a bit like the woman in Pride and Prejudice who marries Wickham  in the end. However the fact is that I do take a lead in our partnership. It has just ended up that way. I do consider myself a patriarch, in as much as I’m the dad in our family and my wife is the matriarch. I do not consider these words to define the role within our family though. It just so happens that I am the one who works and my wife is the one who works at home. To read into everything as sexist or not, mysogonist or not chauvinist or not is a lifelong game. if you want to go on playing it then you are welcome, however I would suggest that it wastes valuable time. Just get on with it, find the roles that suit your set up and just do it. 

I was once asked in a job interview what Equal Opportunities meant to me. They were obviously trying to gauge my enthusiasm for their policy. I answered that I don’t believe in equal opportunities. Such policies shouldn’t exist as it should be taught that gender and race are not impediments to a task, but ability is. I think this is fair.

My twitter followers will be aware of the amount of filth I have reblogged, I make no apologies as tumblr and twitter are adult oriented. These are images I want to share, it’s not dirty in my mind and it’s a voyage of discovery that I’m comfortable with. What I share I aim to be something beautiful and erotic, not necessarily just for men but with women like my wife in mind. Reality is also incredibly important. So there’s my explanation. Hope it goes some way for you.